.....A Little Problem_Fanfic

I need a drink lamented Roy as he sat on the edge of the bed, head in his hands as he tried to fight back the throbbing pain that threatened to consume the inside of his skull.  He stared down between his fingers at his now “modified” pants; he had been forced to roll the legs up several times just to keep from tripping in them. He also had to make a few extra holes in his belt in order to cinch it up as far as possible to keep his pants from falling down. As for his jacket, he had to discard it in  lieu of a simple white tank top. "Yes, a drink would be really nice right about now" reflected Roy as he contemplated his socks.
A noise outside the door brought Roy out of his stupor with a jerk of his head to watch lieutenant Hawkeye enter. "Finally" thought Roy, as she silently shut the door behind her.   
“Well, aside from the effects of the de-aging, you seem to be in perfect health sir“stated the Lieutenant, coming to stop before him and resting her hands behind her back.
“What do you suggest we do” She finished, eyeing her commanding officer anxiously. Roy massaged his forehead, no rest for the weary he thought dryly.
“I don’t see what we CAN do except return to Central and……” he grunted as he stood, stopping mid-sentence as his eyes meet a certain blond alchemist’s gaze who made his way over to stand next to Riza. Roy found that he actually had to tilt his head back a bit to look the other in the face properly. Roy blanched at Fullmetal’s blank stare; he had been troubled by the other’s unusual quietness; for Edward seemed oddly calm about the whole situation and the Colonel had been expecting a some what more intense reaction from the young alchemist. So now, as he stared up into his young subordinate’s face; he wondered what was going on behind those unruly golden eyes. Wait a moment?!......he was staring up…? The horrible truth finally sunk in and it seemed Edward finally grasped it as well.
“So…de-aged by half huh?” prompted Edward, as a sly grin appeared on his face.
“Ummm…A..Actually I think they said it was by a factor of three…” Stammered Roy franticly, as he turned desperately toward Riza for support.
“It was half sir” Corrected Riza matter of factly, refusing to indulge in the colonel’s futile attempts to save face.     
“Hmm..So that would make you about….” Edward continued, rubbing his chin in mock contemplation and smirking.
“Ten!!” shouted Roy desperately in Edward’s face, only to have Riza interject with a jaded “15 sir”
Damn that woman! She was enjoying this, and that composed face of her's was not fooling him.
Edward on the other hand was making no attempt to hide his glee.
“Maybe we should start calling you Colonel Foal” snickered Edward sarcastically.
Foal?!!...  Glowered Roy, grasping the obvious play on his name, but before he could respond to the offending Jab, Huges, whose as usual seemed to appear out of now where and at the worst possible time, cut in.
“Really takes you back to the academy days don’t it?” he smiled cheerfully and commenced to roughly mess Roy’s hair. It also seemed that Riza could no longer hold her composure and an amused smile played on her lips.
“Indeed sir” she murmured.  
That was it, there was only so much one colonel could take.
“YOU ARE ALL SO FIRED!” Roy shouted threateningly, shaking his fist up and down, though in his current state, it seemed less like a threat and more like he was throwing a temper tantrum. So it did not quiet have the intended effect Roy was aiming for; considering everyone broke out in laughter. Edward obviously found it hilarious, since he was doubled over with mirth, clutching his sides. Huges on the other hand was bent back, one hand on his forehead while the other rested on his hip in order to keep him from toppling over backwards as he roared with laughter . It seemed that only Riza was making an effort to control herself, but still she could not hold back a chuckle or two that escaped her lips. Roy stood there, glaring and flushed with indignation. He did not find this funny, not one bit, and their laughter only fueled his frustration. Damn it he demanded respect and he was going to get it!  Breaking away from them and mustering up an aura of autority, he pointed an accusing finger at them.
“You find this amusing? No matter what I am your commanding officer and demand to be treated as such!” exclaimed Roy.
However, this statement that just seconds ago sounded impressive and commanding to Roy now did not seem very much so. To the contrary, in his current state it came off as juvenile. The others seem to think so too, as a new wave of laughter over took them
“Stop…it…..colonel……you’re killing us!” Gasped Ed, struggling to get the sentence out, unable to breath let alone speak from sheer laughter.
Riza, her face composed once more, except for the lingering smile, addressed her commanding officer.
“Forgive us sir, but in your current state you are very….amusing” she chuckled.
“Do I look amused?” growled Roy darkly.
“Come on Roy lighten up, it could be worse if you think about it” offered Huges encouragingly, wiping away a tear.
Roy only growled, if anything Huges was right, he was lucky to still be alive considering what happened. None the less, that did not make his predicament any more enjoyable. He simply would have to resign himself to the fact that he would probably have to go though similar humiliating scenarios. Which is why he intended to make himself scarce until a solution could be found……hopefully.
A cure….Roy did not really want to face that topic just yet, just thinking about it made his stomach twist into tight knots. What if there was no cure?...NO! He swept those thoughts away, now was not the time to ponder such things. He would tackle that bridge when it came time to cross it; right now he needed to……
Roy made his way back to the bed and dropped unceremoniously on to it. The throbbing was coming back with a vengeance, prompting him to rub his temples in an effort to relieve the pain.
His discomfort was not lost to the Second Lieutenant and sympathy and worry clouded Riza’s face. The colonel obviously needed more time to rest, but the man was too stubborn to admit it, which is why she would have to take the incentive.
Clearing her throat “Sir if I might make a suggestion?” she waited for a response, when none came she continued “sir I think it would be in your best interest if you took a leave of absence” Riza finished, waiting for him to protest at her proposal. After all, he was a vey stubborn man,
Roy sat there silently for a moment, eye’s closed in contemplation. Slowly he opened them again as he breathed a sigh.
“I had considered that….and I would rather avoid an official inquiry from the higher ups as much as possible and not have anybody else see me in such a manner” He stated, turning towards them. Actually the more Roy thought about it the more he relished the idea. No working like a dog at Central Command, no having to deal with endless stacks of paper work and stressful deadlines.
“Yes, I think it is time I took a break”   He asserted avidly. “We just need to need to make….” “One more thing sir” Riza cut him off before he could finish.
Roy faced his second lieutenant; something about the tone of her voice did not bode well.
“May I suggest that you take your leave in Rismebool along with Fullmetal”
There was a slight pause before Roy and Edward erupted in a thunderous “WHAT?!!”  
“I object!” Roy spat.
“Me too! Since when was it part of my job to babysit?!” growled Edward, thrusting a finger in Roy’s direction.
“Excuse me?!” Roy growled back outraged “I am twice your age!”
“But you are not at the moment now are you? You maybe the colonel, but right now you’re just a scrawny kid” Edward pointed out bluntly.
Roy’s voice took on a threatening tone “Watch it Fullmetal, I maybe a scrawny kid but I am still the Flame Alchemist” and he reached for his gloves.
Before things could escalate between the two, Riza stepped between them less they take out the whole floor while they settle their differences.
“Honestly Edward, that is no way to speak to your commanding officer” chided Riza.
“And you sir, act your age” giving Roy a meaningful stare.
Both boys turned their attention on her, brows knotted in a wooden expression. All the same, she felt their shoulders relax under her grip and it seemed like the two would back off, much to Riza’s relief. However harmony did not even have a chance to settle in before a mocking snort emitted from Edward’s direction.
This set off Roy and thus led to the two once again threatening and hurling insults at each other.
Riza sighed; it was going to be a long week.